I’d rather have Miguel Sano on my street team than my baseball club

– Miguel Sano reported to spring training Sunday, the three issues that complicate his 2018 season — health, weight and an assault investigation — seemingly reduced to two.

Sano has been given medical clearance to engage in all baseball workouts with his teammates, his surgically reinforced left shin now completely healed, though the Twins intend to lighten his schedule to prevent any new injuries.


They’d like to lighten something else, too: His “generous carriage,” as General Manager Thad Levine delicately put it last week. Sano’s conditioning understandably lags, after a winter largely spent incapacitated by the surgery.


And further clouding the third baseman’s status is an investigation by the commissioner’s office into allegations made in December of an assault on a Twin Cities photographer 29 months ago, an incident Sano has denied. MLB Commissioner Rob Manfred has the power to impose penalties — fines, suspensions or sensitivity training, among other options — if he finds that evidence warrants it.

Minnesota Twins third baseman Miguel Sano is fat. There’s no question about it. It seems that this past winter Sano spent more time on a doctors tables eating zebra cakes and twinkies than doing any physical activity. Especially for someone that is in hot water with a assault allegations hanging over his head. If he’d ever head to prison being in shape is a must. So I guess we can 100 percent say that he will not be headed to prison anytime soon due to his current figure. I like a fat Sano. It makes him look like he’s got street cred. Especially with that ugly has hair. He literally looks like Celia Mae from Monsters Inc.

Listen, if Sano ever decides that baseball isn’t for him because staying in shape isn’t for him. And if I ever decided to start MLB Street I’m taking him with my first pick. The dude just looks bad. He shows off a smile but inside he just hates everything. If he’s out on the town I’m not asking him for his autograph unless he guarantees to hit 50-plus homers this season.

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