BREAKING NEWS: It’s cold as fuck out no shit

Every fukn news station north of the Missouri is thriving off the cold temperatures.

BREAKING NEWS: Frigid temps this week

NO SHIT!

If you don’t go outside at least once a day what the fuk are you doing with your life? Everyone knows it’s cold out. I stepped outside in shorts yesterday just to see if I could feel the difference between -10 and -20 and news flash you cannot. I get that your little news station has to report on the weather but no one fukn cares. Its late December everyone knows it’s gonna be cold and there’s nothing we can do about it unless you move your dog and your wife to Arizona.

I don’t even look at the temps anymore. I don’t check the weather channel, or my weather app or the weather in the newspaper because I have common sense that once the month of December rolls around and snow starts to fall, it’s gonna be chilly out. So don’t waste my time with weather shit when everyone in this world is a weatherman with a touch of their phone.

 

 

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